Malluchan's Crazy Crashup
by Malluchan
Summary: Tsubasa appears asking for directions in Casey's hockey gym; it is the day before his birthday, and then all of a sudden Ryuga appears. Could things get any worse?


This is a strange little thing I came up with half while washing the dishes this evening and half while sitting here getting reacquainted with my keyboard; this is due to the fact that I have been away from my laptop for the past week and we forgot about each other.

Anyway here I give you: The epic failing disaster that occurs when my tangled mind writes a crossover between Beyblade: Metal Saga and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: 2012.

I could do a real good job at this, you know, but it turned out random because I made it up while my brother was present. You know how these things are. Don't you?

* * *

It was a nice night out. But Casey Jones and April O'Neil chose to spend it inside a hockey stadium; April would call out random test questions, and if Casey got them right, he got to try to score a goal. Often Casey went and scored goals when he got the questions wrong as well. This was cheating.

All of a sudden, totally randomly and NOT foreseen by Ryutarou Fukami or anyone else for that matter, a large and bumbling figure came into the hockey stadium.

He had long and flowing hair and he was actually not that large, but he had tripped over a plastic duck which Casey had left in the entrance, so the bumbling part was actually pretty accurate.

April turned, largely annoyed and reasonably offended, at the presence of the stranger in the hockey stadium. "What do you think you're doing?" she asked. "The sign on the door clearly says SIS."

"I beg your pardon, Ma'am, but I have no earthly idea what that means", the stranger informed her.

"STUDY IN SESSION. It's a widely known fact! Get in the game!"

"I thought SIS was short for sister", Casey put in timidly.

"YOU STAY OUTTA THIS. What are you doing here, you weirdo!?"

"Sorry to bother you. I'm looking for my friend. I don't know where he went."

"What friend?"

"He is a bit short and he has spiky black and white hair. He loves panda bears as well. Wait - this isn't the Dungeon Gym?"

"I have no idea what that is. Sorry, I can't help you. Now will you please go away?"

"Oooh, is that algebra?"

Casey, formerly preoccupied with a large cockroach that had taken up residence on the hockey net, turned to find the stranger squinting over April's shoulder at his algebra homework. April irritably shrugged him off. "Don't you have a mohawk guy to find?"

"Just go with it", Casey hissed. "listen to her or you'll be sorry!"

April whirled. "Now what is that supposed to mean!?"

All of a sudden the roof fell in randomly. Casey yelled and lunged for the plastic duck at the entrance. (Why this was the first thing on Casey's mind, I don't know.)

Then a large and bumbling figure fell into the room - suffice it to say that the large part was accurate this time, as well as the bumbling part.

"Mikey!? What are you doing here?"

"I don't know, April", answered the groaning lump. "There are some really creepy guys on the roof."

The tall stranger leaned forward eagerly. "What do they look like?"

"There was this one with a mohawk who kept calling us 'foot-stomping maniacs' - "

"I know that guy!" The boy ran out the door, tripping over Casey and his precious duck on the way. April sighed loudly at the collapsed roof of the hockey stadium, and Mikey finished his sentence.

"And Karai."

* * *

Tsubasa emerged on the roof to find 3 large turtles fighting a black-haired girl and also Zeo, while Masamune was tied up on the edge of the roof.

"What's happening up here?"

"I don't know. I got tied up in all the confusion and THEY TOOK MY PIZZA", wailed Masamune. Tsubasa cut him lose and turned his attention to the turtles.

"Oh no! They're trying to attack that girl! STAY AWAY, CREEPS!" Tsubasa pulled out his beyblade and unleashed it on the turtles.

"You don't understand, I WAS TOTALLY WINNING!"

"Stay out of the way, ma'am, he has everything under control", Tobii told her, grabbing her arm and pulling her away from the fight.

The turtle in the blue bandanna threw himself to the grounf below as the beyblade came flying his way.

"They seem to be some sort of advanced shuriken technology", yelled the purple-bandannad one. "I would have to study them further!"

"Get your head in the game, brainiac", grunted the turtle in red, slicing at eagle with his sai.

"HEY!" Tsubasa snatched Eagle from the air and stamped his foot. "That is NOT nice! We do NOT slice beys with our weapons, young man!"

"He is handling this quite well", Karai commented.

"You're supposed to take out YOUR beyblade and battle ME", Tsubasa explained patiently. "Not hit it with salad tongs."

"They ain't salad tongs, you creep!"

"YOU are the creep here, sir."

"I don't like this guy, Don", said the turtle. "He has a bit of an attitude problem."

"I do NOT have an attitude problem."

"And seriously, what's with the hair?" Raph plucked at Tsubasa's hairdo. Tsubasa smacked his hand away. "Don't touch it. You're gonna mess it up."

"I found his weakness! Leo, infiltrate!"

Leo was already in action. In one swift motion, he sliced off Tsubasa's hair with his sword.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Tsubasa fell to his knees in horror.

Tobii gasped. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM!? Tsubasa, don't cry, it's okay!" He and the other two members of Team Dungeon hurried over to their friend, and Karai was the only one who heard the purple VW Bug pull up in the parking lot outside the school.

* * *

Casey groaned in horror at the destruction of his beloved hockey stadium. "How are we going to explain this to the principle?"

April turned on Mikey. "What did you even DO, Mikey?"

"Ehehehe...I guess that mohawk guy was heavier than he looked?"

"Is this about pizza again?"

Mikey slumped in shame. "Y-yeah..."

"How many times have I told you, Mikey. You can't just attack random people because you want their pizza!"

"B-but he could've been a criminal! He has like a gun that shot this wicked shuriken at me. And he yelled 'RAY STRIKER', and like this unicorn appeared in the sky!"

Casey jumped up. "HEY! That sounds like this old show I used to watch when I was a little kid!" He ran outside and was caught short in the glare of headlights from a purple VW Bug.

* * *

Masamune gasped as Ryo Hagane and Hikaru Hasama stepped out of the VW Bug in the parking lot. "OH NO! We can't let them see Tsubasa like this!" Thinking quickly, he grabbed a roll of tape from his pocket and taped Tsubasa's cut off hair onto Tobii's head, pushing the REAL Tsubasa through the hole Mikey had made in the roof.

"Now pretend to be Tsubasa so we don't get in trouble."

"You're creepy, Masamune", Tobii told him, shuddering at the shed hair falling around his shoulders.

Ryo called up to the roof. "Hey, is Tsubasa here yet?"

"Yeah. He's up here on the roof with us", Zeo lied.

"TSUBASA! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Yelled Gingka, jumping out from the back of the car. Tobii moaned in disgust as Gingka showered him with stale popcorn and chicken legs (for lack of confetti).

"Do I have to do this, Masamune?"

"Yes."

"It's not his birthday, Gingka, his birthday's tomorrow", Zeo reminded him.

"Oh well." Ryo hustled Tobii, Zeo, and Masamune into the car. "We're going to a restaurant. Hey, where's Tobii?"

"He's sick", Zeo said quickly, as Masamune said, "He got hit by a bus."

"Yeah, he got hit by a bus while he had the flu", the real Tobii covered quickly.

"Why is Tsubasa wearing his clothes, and have scotch tape in his hair?"

"Masamune pushed me off a cliff and my clothes got dirty", Tobii said.

"WHAT!? DID NOT!"

"This is all your fault", Tobii reminded him.

"And as for the tape, it's the latest fashion", said Zeo, as Masamune said "It's for health reasons."

"Okay, guys. Whatever you say." Ryo then decided that he would drag everyone else along, and somehow crammed Leo, Mikey, Donnie, Raph, Karai, April, and even Casey into the trunk.

At a restaurant, chaos continued to happen.

Ryo decided he would order fried bat for Tsubasa's birthday; unluckily, Tobii was allergic to bats and vegetarian. He ate it anyway and ended up with a swollen face.

Then Mikey poured lemonade all over the waitress because he thought she sabotaged the food.

Finally April asked Ryo just to drop them all off back at the hockey stadium, but as they got there, the real Tsubasa came out with all his ahir cut off and started yelling at the turtles.

"WAIT! YOU'RE NOT EVEN THE REAL TSUBASA!" Ryo pointed accusingly at Tobii, who shook his swollen head.

"Oh, Tsubasa, what have they done to you!?" cried Gingka in horror.

And then all of a sudden Ryuga appeared in a flash of lightning.

"Hey everyone. Tsubasa, you look horrible. I'm just gonna go now because I hate parking lot crisises and also I can't handle drama." And then he disappeared, mistakenly taking April with him.

Later it got in the news that April had unlocked her evil side and was ruling an alternate dimension alongside Ryuga.

The End (for now)


End file.
